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Clean It Up Or Pay The Price!

by Pet Shop Fashion

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1.
AVE C 03:36
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Don't look...Close your eyes And just believe There's no reason to deny me Truth is within our deluded minds... Just last night, the world was created And all I got was this damn T-shirt! Down from the sky came a brilliant light show It burned my eyes blind Just then, I heard an extremely loud voice that said something like, "What up?" To which I replied, "Nothin' much. How 'bout you?" There was no answer...Just silence... Welcome to my neighborhood It's on Avenue C Throw away your intellect And join the party All of the catering Is provided by gnomes And for no good reason We don't leave our homes Well, I bet you are wondering How the world began after you were born This knowledge is beyond our understanding But, I can simplify... Like you, I have plenty of photos And memories locked in my brain Those are all tricks put there to deceive you And hide the truth...Don't be fooled! Welcome to my neighborhood It's on Avenue C Throw away your intellect And join the party All of the catering Is provided by gnomes And for no good reason We don't leave our homes
2.
A Bad Joke 03:41
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Some say that I've lost my way Others say they have the directions How many psychiatrists does it take To change a light bulb? One, but the light bulb has to really want to change! Tag me now – I’m it! One size doesn't fit all I’m torn inside So sew me If you look at the label Then you will see that I can’t be put Through your machine When you can’t remove Deep stains in your fabric You should start A new trend Be the life of the party And the death of Formalities That keep you down on your knees Some say that I've found my way Others say they need my direction How is a psychologist different from A magician? A psychologist pulls habits out of rats!
3.
Scared To Be Sarcastic 04:17
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I don't mind turpentine mixed in with my food I don't care if I'm bare naked on my roof It doesn't seem to bother me when you are obnoxious I don't mind Not one bit I don't mind at all You know I'm scared to be sarcastic anymore Because someone else will draw the line I don't care if you're drunk and punch me in the gut It feels good I feel so alive Do it one more time I don't mind a kick to the crotch if it gets a laugh Someday I'll be underground taking a dirt bath I don't mind the lyrics to the song I'm singing now They are great Seriously They're the best around Thought-provoking and profound are what come to mind If you don't notice this, then you must be blind
4.
Simple 04:23
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I see no need for things I see no need for games All I want is now All I need is how To live without greed; without regret, without suffering Can I find stillness? Can I still exist? Is this my burden? Is nothing certain? Simple is more than just my way of life
5.
Mannequins For Dummies 03:04
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I'm on the hunt for some measurements But not any measurements will do Quantifying beauty is an art I'm on the prowl for some inches But too many inches will not do Smaller numbers are where we will start Make the face symmetrical Make the waist an hour glass Make the chest impossible to lift Make it asymmetrical Make the waist straight up and down Make the chest impossible to see I'm on the hunt for some measurements But not any measurements will do Searching for perfection is an art I'm on the prowl for some inches But too many inches will not do Plastic skin will inspire plastic hearts
6.
Cosmic Timing 04:49
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Poor spirits can never get change for their paradigms While rich spirits know they can step in and fill their meters whenever they’re getting low “How can I seize the day When the bank seized my car?” People often think they’re in the driver’s seat Until they have those feelings of utter defeat But they don’t last forever Poor spirits fight to keep the jobs where they slowly die While rich spirits fight to achieve goals that give them peace when they reach the end of their lives “How can I seize the day When someone seized my job?” Outsourcing employment when the wages get higher Is justified in profit wars as friendly fire Let’s blame it all on Bad cosmic timing The universe conspires to keep us down Let’s thank the stars for Good cosmic timing And the ability to laugh at ourselves “How can I seize the day When rough seas steer my ship?” People seldom match their feelings of sinking With the violent storms in the clouds of their thinking So talk about the “whether” Poor spirits are blind to the path of prosperity While rich spirits can travel the tough terrain that leads them to a hidden paradise “How can I seize the day When no one sees my pain?” If all of your troubles were to disappear Boredom is the next thing you would likely fear
7.
Person Who 04:16
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Have you heard of that guy Who woke up in a bathtub in Mexico? Well, they say he looked so frightened He was missing his spleen And in it's place was a transmitter That would send strange signals to the mother ship... I'm a person who Knew someone that this happened to And so now I'm sure That it must be true Have you heard of this pill That helps you lose all of the weight you want? Well, they say it works like magic You can sit on the couch And watch all of the inches just melt away You don't even have to lift a finger I'm a person who Knew someone that this happened to And so now I'm sure That it must be true Have you heard of that girl Who woke up from a near death experience? Well, they say she looked so frightened She was plunged deep into A dungeon of torture and suffering And the ring leader was Reverend Falwell... I'm a person who Knew someone that this happened to And so now I'm sure That it must be true
8.
Kung Fu Mathematician 04:28
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Kung Fu Mathematician He'll chop you right in half And then divide the parts for The men in his commutative group Kung Fu Mathematician He's gonna subtract your life! What is the square root of pi? I'll tell you, man...It's a piece... A piece of the action And peace of mind Bombs with the words "Peace be with you" printed on them Will give us peace on Earth and We'll all be like peas n' carrots again Kung Fu Mathematician The derivative of pain You'll learn via induction The meaning of defeat Kung Fu Mathematician He's gonna subtract your life! Tell me something, friend... Is it even hipper to be cubed? You know, being popular Should be the most important thing in your life So, destroy those who stand in your way Because everyone will love you for it And from the ashes of some eyesore called a "forest" Comes the beauty of a new shopping center
9.
I'll Take My Chances 04:48
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A man came up to me one day Miming like he had a gun And threatening to shoot me This could be the day I die Without a chance to say goodbye I think I'll take my chances You must live your life Never mind the risks Don't let empty threats Keep you up at night A gypsy put a curse on me She said that I would lose my mind And manifest my destiny This could be the day I change Homeless, desperate, and deranged I think I'll take my chances A priest came up to me one day Screaming like a man of peace And threatening damnation He says that I will go to hell Because I'm such an infidel I think I'll take my chances
10.
Hitler As a Baby 04:48
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Late last night, I woke up in a sweat and rubbed my tired eyes But I couldn't prepare myself for the next surprise Sitting in my doorway I jumped four feet back and started to yell as it crawled across the room That's when I began to smell the sweet perfume Of Hitler's mother Some will call it nature Others say nurture Would you kill Hitler as a baby Or teach him new ways to view this diverse world? Everyone wants to feel comfort in many different ways Some need a rattle, others set something ablaze Like the whole world Children are not the only ones who will throw a fit Adult tantrums can turn our world to shit Someone call a plumber
11.
Blessed Are the Silly 06:04
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If you're feeling bored Why not build a robot To eat up all the pests in the world? And if you're feeling numb Why not light a candle To burn up all the pests in your heart? Blessed are the silly Where pain and love become one In all my long lived years I have not found True bliss In all my long lived years I have searched for True bliss Give up now because you'll never find Just what you're looking for Only when you start to look inside Will you find your true bliss If all you want is to be happy Then bake yourself a cookie And eat it all up until it's gone You will start to miss it
12.
Speaking in Tongue-in-Cheek 05:01
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Somewhere in my mind I'm looking for a sign of a new beginning Somewhere in my head I'm looking for a voice of cosmic origins I think I'm going crazy because I don't hear voices in my head I must be going crazy because I don't hear voices in my head
13.
Goddess of the Gap 04:15
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See that young girl driving by She loves to be in control and she doesn't know why There is a hole in her heart That can only be filled by some things in a shopping cart Daddy says she's a princess No one can tell her she's not The whole world owes her everything She is the goddess of the gap Check out those fancy new threads She'll be the envy of every last one of her friends But all the material girls Lack any substance in their very material worlds Notice her skinny physique She got that way because she didn't eat for a week Mommy would tell her she's fat And that no man could ever love someone who's built like that
14.
Holy Parthenogenetic Mary! 04:35
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All behold our new god Who was sent by Mother Nature To save our souls And the planet The offspring of a hammerhead Came to Earth to sacrifice its life And wash away our Environmental sins Something happened to this shark That I cannot explain and Virgin births don't happen every day So I think this must be a miracle Everyone gather round And bear witness to the sacrifice That was made By our new god A stingray took away its life For the carbon footprints of the world And forgiveness For the ones to come
15.
Armageddon (Sick of Prophecies) 03:29
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Betcha can't wait 'till the whole world ends So you can be in heaven with all your friends Betcha can't wait for the heathens to burn Schadenfreudian slips make my stomach turn Wow I'm so fucking sick Sick of prophecies I'm so doggone sick Sick of prophecies You are a weapon of mass destruction Due to a belief of your own construction Bullying people is your way of life You threaten them with the invisible strife Wow I'm so fucking sick Sick of prophecies I'm so gosh darn sick Sick of prophecies Excuse me! Does anyone wanna buy a Y2K kit for $19.99? So when someone tries to tell you that the end times are near Tell that self-righteous prick... I'm so fucking sick Sick of prophecies I'm so goddamn sick Sick of prophecies
16.
My Obsessive Compulsive Escape Plan 03:09
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I'll get out of here somehow I just need to make sure that I Can do it in under 59 steps Using the fire escape Is not a good option because It's on the south side of my apartment I have a plan To do everything I can Within the limits that I choose I'd rather die Than completely compromise The scheme that I know I have to use Maybe I can have someone Carry me part of the way To avoid taking too many steps I need to figure this out Because the flames are getting hot And it's getting very hard to breathe
17.
Wetting Invitation 04:09
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Hold your breath and Pray to Dog We are gonna marry this idea Say your vows To obey When we get our heads pushed in the mud You might be tempted to think for yourself But that will soon go away All is fair in love and war All is fair in love and war My country Will own everything in the world You will watch our movies And always eat our cuisine
18.
Get a Room 02:58
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Today is the best day of my life And I thought you'd like to know Everything that happened to me You will feel so happy The sky is clear The birds are chirping And everything is great Even the allergies That are secretly killing me Nothing could ruin any part of this day I wouldn't want things any other way Because I just stole a car ...Because I just splashed some homeless guy When you feel the thrill of cutting someone off You might just be missing the point When you feel the rush of flicking someone off You might just want to get a room What are my two favorite words? "I" and "WIN"!
19.
First World Problem 03:38
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I had such a wretched day I don't know where to begin When you hear what I have to say You'll play your small violin And I will sing this song About everything that's wrong In my life today You will get so mad About the fact my life is bad That you will not sleep The guy at the coffee shop Told me that I had to wait This pushed me over the top And I screamed, "Well, that's just great!"

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released March 10, 2013

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Pet Shop Fashion image

Pet Shop Fashion Colorado

Coitus, pharmaceuticals, and whatever Alan Freed's ghost calls my music.

These rough recordings are some musical ideas I've had over the years. The process is very slow because I'm doing everything on my own - guitars, drums, vocals, lyrics, recording, mixing, etc. I hope to someday record them again with a band and maybe play them live. Until then, enjoy listening to my creative process. ... more

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